July 4

It holds a special meaning to me - what would have been 34 years of wedded bliss had you lived to see it.  Fate has a different path that led to a crossing; the beginning of the end and the end of the beginning.  Looking back at the past holds me captive to a thousand 'what if's' that knew no answers.  Yet the grieving is unending and the joy is ever elusive from here on.

Only through the eyes of our children do I find traces of your material being.  You were once here - alive not just in memory.  Close enough to touch that a chasm now renders impassable; without breach, unattainable.

Oh heart of hearts that sorrowing never mends; it bleeds copiously with no end.  It is a dagger forever impaled in my mind; memories flooding as my tears flow, filled with remorse for losing the one part of me that made me whole.