An Unfathomable Sadness
Two years ago and what seemed like a lifetime that passed, all seemed tranquil, serene, returning to its previous state of quietude and peace. What looked like acceptance and resignation to the forces that tore our lives in turmoil with your death has slowly dissipated. In its stead is an unnamed emotion, an unbearable loss, an unfathomable sadness.
People told me it will soon pass and it won’t hurt as much. They were right and at the same they were wrong. The wailing and the passionate indignation and anger against life’s cruel endings has indeed subsided. But the hurting never stopped.
And so I love, yet half live. I long to have you physically resurrect like a ghost that keeps remembering. And every time the memory unfolds, the tears come gushing forth. Crying out to you, letting bitterness sink deeper still. My heart is broken without you.
People told me it will soon pass and it won’t hurt as much. They were right and at the same they were wrong. The wailing and the passionate indignation and anger against life’s cruel endings has indeed subsided. But the hurting never stopped.
And so I love, yet half live. I long to have you physically resurrect like a ghost that keeps remembering. And every time the memory unfolds, the tears come gushing forth. Crying out to you, letting bitterness sink deeper still. My heart is broken without you.